Fire and Forget: My Approach to Social Media

I have what I call a “fire and forget” approach to social media.

I post. I comment. I state my opinion. Then I wander off and do something else.

Apparently, this is not how social media is supposed to work.

The modern formula seems to require posting something, checking it 47 times, monitoring every reaction, defending yourself against strangers, arguing over punctuation, refreshing notifications, and eventually becoming emotionally invested in whether someone named PatriotMom1776 thinks you are an idiot.

I simply do not have the energy for that.

Post It and Walk Away

When I write something on social media, particularly about politics, veterans' issues, military families, government policy, or advocacy, I generally know what I want to say before I hit “post.”

That does not mean I think I am always right.

It means I have expressed my opinion based on the information I have at the time.

People are free to agree.

People are free to disagree.

People are free to scroll past it, argue about it, share it, delete it, block me, or write a 14-paragraph response explaining why I have personally caused the collapse of Western civilization.

Meanwhile, I may be three posts down the road looking at something completely unrelated.

Fire. Forget. Move on.

Social Media Is Not a Hostage Situation

One of the strangest things about social media is the expectation that once you comment on something, you have somehow entered into a legally binding agreement to debate everyone who responds.

I disagree.

A comment is not a summons.

I can say what I think without spending the next six hours defending it.

Sometimes I will engage if someone raises an interesting point, provides information I did not have, or genuinely wants a discussion.

But if the conversation becomes repetitive, insulting, or ridiculous?

I leave.

There is no prize for being the last person still arguing in a Facebook comment section at 2:00 a.m.

I Refuse to Be Offended Professionally

I also make a conscious effort not to become emotionally attached to everything I post.

Posts get deleted.

Comments disappear.

People misunderstand things.

Moderators make decisions I disagree with.

Algorithms bury posts.

Someone inevitably becomes offended.

That is social media.

If something I write is removed from a group, I generally shrug and move along.

It is their group.

Their page.

Their rules.

I may think the decision is stupid. I may even say so somewhere else. But I am not going to spend three days emotionally recovering because a Facebook administrator deleted my comment.

Life is too short.

Opinions Are Supposed to Be Challenged

This approach does not mean I avoid disagreement.

Quite the opposite.

I actually think disagreement is healthy.

If you cannot defend your position when someone presents better evidence, perhaps you should reconsider your position.

I have changed my mind before.

I will change my mind again.

There is an enormous difference between having strong opinions and believing your opinions are sacred.

Sometimes someone will respond to something I wrote with information I had not considered.

Great.

Now I know something I did not know yesterday.

That is supposed to be the point of exchanging ideas.

Social Media Is a Tool, Not My Identity

Perhaps the biggest reason I use the fire-and-forget method is that social media is simply a tool.

It is not my entire personality.

It is not my source of self-worth.

Likes do not make me correct.

Angry emojis do not make me wrong.

Followers do not automatically make someone knowledgeable, and a blue checkmark does not magically confer wisdom.

I use social media to share information, advocate for issues, occasionally complain about government bureaucracy, make observations, tell stories, and sometimes entertain myself.

Then I go live my actual life.

The Internet Has a Short Memory

There is another benefit to this approach: perspective.

Today's enormous social-media controversy will usually be replaced by another enormous social-media controversy tomorrow.

And another one the day after that.

The internet moves at the speed of outrage.

Trying to emotionally participate in every argument is exhausting.

So I choose my battles.

Some issues deserve sustained attention. Some deserve research, phone calls, letters, meetings, testimony, and actual advocacy.

Others deserve exactly one sarcastic comment before I wander off to look at something else.

Learning the difference has dramatically improved my relationship with social media.

Fire. Forget. Repeat.

So yes, my social-media strategy is occasionally closer to “spray and pray” than a carefully managed communications campaign.

I put ideas into the world.

Some land.

Some do not.

Some generate productive conversations.

Some attract people who apparently woke up that morning hoping to fight a stranger on the internet.

Either way, I refuse to hand a comment section control over my blood pressure.

Say what you mean.

Be willing to correct yourself when necessary.

Do not confuse disagreement with personal attack.

Do not confuse engagement with obligation.

And above all, remember that the little glowing rectangle in your hand has an off button.

Sometimes the healthiest social-media strategy really is:

Fire. Forget. Go make a sandwich.